Who Are Your True Friends?

Original first draft of the Emancipation Proclamation

Your true friends, who are they? The imperfect one says this to himself, and his true friends:
"Understand something please... you are and always will be good enough, regardless to what anyone else ever says."

The imperfect one has been told at least once, well more than that he's pretty certain, that people were doing something for his benefit. The part where your parents tell you that they are grounding you, or going to punish you for your own good, well that part's true. When a person claiming to be your friend tells you that, you know it's time to take cover. What that person is telling you is that you are not worth the effort.

February 13, 2013 marks the 150th anniversary of the Emancipation Proclamation. For the benefit of a people, and a nation, slavery was abolished. Freedom is a wonderful thing isn't it? It is until someone sends a family or another individual out with no food, no funds, and literally no way to survive. That type of freedom is not for their benefit. That type of freedom is not beneficial to anyone.

"I'll be around ain't going nowhere..."

People say they'll be there for you, that is until you need something, then unlike 311's promise (I'll be around ain't going nowhere), and more like Karl's tag on the Parkway sign (above picture upper right hand corner)... they become temporary acquaintances rather than life long friends. People argue, and break up over totally ridiculous things. Two people meet, and have coffee and great conversation. They become friends and talk everyday for months, then one finds out that the other pulls for a rival school in college hoops, and they suddenly hate and shun one another! A husband and wife, best friends for years, are doing well until the general election sees the wife agree with the Democratic candidate, and the husband favor the GOP candidate. This difference sees them divorce over two people that they do not even know personally, and know very little about at all. They are only certain of two policies, and because of those policies they argue, don't make up, and divorce! Don't be a "Karl was here," be a "Karl IS here." If you can't talk everyday anymore, so be it, but at least be civil and talk. You never know, one day you just might need the person you turned your back on! Be-trayal, is not always a bee-line trail, or a "be gone". Judas betrayed Jesus, and was terribly upset with his (Judas) own actions. He went to the people that encouraged him to betray Jesus to make things right. The holier than thou priesthood turned him away and said that the damage was done. Judas went to everyone but the right person to ask for forgiveness, and to right the wrong. He felt that Jesus was going to die anyway, and that if he was seen with Jesus that he to would be put to death. Rather than turn to Jesus (his true friend) he went to those that cared for no one, and his fate was much worse. He betrayed his God, then himself! You don't have to go away for the sake of someone else to make it right, and be friends. It's much better when you can sit and settle things with the one that needs you. We can't afford to be a Judas or leave a Judas out there alone. Why? Because if we wait for them (the Judas') to hit rock bottom and think that then they will have no choice but to seek help we could be too late. Will they seek help, or do you care friend? Did you lie when saying that you would be there always? So are you asking this now: "They will seek help after rock bottom, right?" Perhaps if death doesn't find them first they will. The imperfect one does not ever want anyone to hear, coming from his mouth, that he is not going to be there for someone, or able to be their friend, or tell them anything negative for that matter when he said that he would be, then try and convince them it's because it's best for them. No matter what the circumstance! No matter what the circumstance! Yes, I repeated myself purposely and with emphasis for a reason. If you are my friend, then you will remain my friend. You can't force anyone to be friendly to you, the imperfect one understands this, but even in their rudeness, or hurt, you can still be there for them, to show them what true friendship is all about. You don't have to abandon other friends for this person, or walk away from family, just have a heart. We are all human, and we all make mistakes. This past year has been quite a learning experience for the imperfect Christian. If the imperfect Christian called you a friend, then you are still a friend. Friends must show themselves friendly. (Proverbs 18:24)

The INterview

Like a boss in an INterview, we should listen. How do you know if that person has what it takes to fit in if you don't listen? Friends or IN, and they listen. Jesus said to Judas, and I'm paraphrasing: Friend do what you have to do. Jesus knew what was coming and still gave Judas a chance to be heard, but Judas didn't say a word with words, just an act of betrayal. (Matthew 26:50)

The imperfect one finds it overly humorous that someone would say that other people don't know when to shut up, or that they totally ruined a good time because of too much talk, then overtly teach someone else how ridiculous it is to make such statements because all they know how to do is run their mouth. Unfortunately it takes someone else to show us that sometimes we are that person to other people. Sometimes to the talker we talk too much, go figure. Is anyone listening yet, or are you waving your hands and talking bad about the IMPERFECT Christian now too? Were we sharing and venting way too much when we should have been caring and circumventing? Sometimes you have to go around the nonsense to get to the heart of the matter. To do that we have to walk in silence and listen. Therefore, today the imperfect one would like to apologize for talking to much, and saying the unnecessary things. Yes, even to the talker, because the imperfect one should have loved you enough to keep his big mouth shut and listen. He will try to do better next time if you will let him.

Guilt should not be confused with hurt. Business as usual, did you have to do that, or did you really hear something tell you how wrong you were this morning? For the good of who? "I'm doing this for the good of you!" Well for the good of you friend, like Jesus I will call you friend and mean it, even if it means the death of me. Jesus went to the cross for all, but only some accepted. So goes life when you give your all to a friend. For some that's still not good enough, but it doesn't mean that you are not good enough. Don't be a doormat, just be a friend. I know how all of those words, and actions have made me feel, and I know what it's like to have someone look you dead in the eye, and more or less tell you with not only words but actions as well, that they do not care if you live or die for another second. Well the imperfect one cares. The imperfect one may not have all the answers, and he is definitely no savior, but he is a friend that will listen. He is having a hard time learning to listen like Jesus though. Listening after betrayal is a tough pill to swallow, but unfortunately the imperfect one knows that it can be done. He knows from Jesus' teaching, and from personal experience.

The imperfect one also knows what it's like for someone to tell him that they are going to do something, and find out that it was only lip service. "Let me come help you!" "I'd do anything for you!" "I'll always be here." The only soul that will guarantee any of those things is God, and a true best friend, if one is fortunate to know either of them. The imperfect one is grateful for the true best friend. If he needed $1,000 there are a few that would give it if they had it to give. There are few that would truly give, but thank God for the few. The few that you would give to someone that they didn't even know. The few that would give to someone after being neglected, abused, betrayed, or misused in the worse way if the need was real. Even if that person wasn't appreciative of the giver! Jesus was that friend.

The imperfect one knows a little something about what Jesus faced in being falsely accused as well. The imperfect one knows what it's like to be rightly and falsely accused. He knows that it's painful to face the music sometimes. He also knows that it's very difficult not to think about revenge when he walks into the concert hall of lies, and anger strikes after the music has been playing out of tune, the lyrics lie, and he can only think about wanting to smash somebodies pipe organ! He understands but wishes that he didn't understand the latter feelings as well as he does.

He knows what it's like to feel less than worthy of someones love, and appreciation. He knows how it feels when a friend says that they never felt good enough. You dear reader may be saying that you have been hurt, and mistreated too, that you are not good enough. Well there are some of us that know those feelings too, you are not alone. Be encouraged however, and know that even when a friendship is on the line, or perhaps even a life is on the line, you have a friend that is right there! The imperfect one wishes that he could be for a lot more of his friends, but he knows that even when he can't cover you, that Jesus has got all of us covered. You dear friend that cared enough to read, were and will be better than just "good enough" to me!

It wasn't about money, or an exchange of favors, in fact it wasn't anything remotely close to that, it was simply about two hearts needing another heart to understand and be there. I want to take time to say thank you for taking time not just to read my "rambling," but to care enough about me to be here for me. So to conclude, if I don't get out and knock on those doors, or have the in person lunches like I would like to, then let me say today, that I love you for being "good enough" to care. That makes you "good enough" in my book for a lifetime.

Peace, Blessings, and Joy... that real PB&J